absolutum dominium

if i am hard on myself, it's because i can't be anything else. i'm scared of being weak again, of being helpless again, of losing control again. i refuse to let myself be ruled by anything or anyone other than myself.

if i am too cold too aloof, it's because i fear being hurt again. i fear being vulnerable again. it takes lessons to teach you what to do and how to behave, and in retrospect you sometimes realise that these lessons aren't all they are cut out to be, but then life is all about learning.

all this time i hold on to the past, to remind myself why i have to be strong, why i have to be rational and logical and never break down again.

but sometimes i forget that i am human. that sometimes moving on really does require letting go.

thank you.

P.S. James says that if i study as much as i blog i will be a genius!

P.P.S. Why men and women are different: men think with the "objective" approach and women, with the "subjective" approach. of which i shall go into a discourse into at a later time.

P.P.P.S. I think I belong in arts. All these ESSAYS that I write. Bwahaha.

P.P.P.P.S. The WORST exam distractor EVER!!! Wahahaha.