absolutum dominium

ANNOUNCEMENT #1:

I shall be in NUS on Monday, 15 August. I'll be meeting GY (and hopefully Sam and Caleb) for lunch @ Arts around 2pm. So therefore if you happen to be at NUS and are free and would like to see me, please DON'T hesitate to drop me a message or call me to let me know when and where.

Things tt I can do at NUS:

1) Makan (any canteen is fine, or Munchies, or Mc's. I'm easy.)
2) Gym, swim, run (will be bringing training gear, swimming costume and running shoes. So will be game for anything if you are)
3) Crash hall (anytime man!)
4) Crash lecture (as long as it's an interesting Arts module like Sci-Fi and Fantasy, and not something like Living with Chemistry, I don't mind crashing your lectures to spend time with you)

ANNOUNCEMENT #2:

My flight details (which I have posted on the side bar as well) are as follows:

Date of Departure: 25 August 2005 (Thursday)
Place of Departure: Changi Airport Terminal 2
Time of Departure: 9.55am
Flight No.: SQ 18
Check-In Time: 8.30am

So that means if you think you don't have classes and you can afford to wake up at an ungodly enough hour and travel an ungodly enough distance to come see me off, please do come around 8.30am! That would be good. :) But like I said, I'm not expecting anyone to coz it really is a pretty godforsaken time and hour. But well, just so you know anyway. For your information only.


That said and done.... moving on to the actual post.


I'm collecting my study permit tomorrow. Apparently it's ready. The CIC just didn't TELL me until I had to goddamn bug them. I've got my room allocation! I have a single room 623 in some house in Totem Park. I'm excited. I'm feeling excited now. My hall is next to this gorgeous nature park where people go trail running. The recre centre (the equivalent of NUS' SRC) has whitewater rafting, ocean kayaking, sports climbing and skydiving (but only in mid-August. SIGH) courses! I think Taekwondo and Jujutsu is free. They have triathalons, duathalons, and runs runs RUNS every fortnight!

I'm thinking of all the things I can possibly do when there. Today I went out for lunch with my dad and mom at this dim sum restaurant called Spring Court, in Chinatown. Then we went to get my luggage. I bought this turqoise blue Delsey luggage for $129.00. The sales promoter won me over when she allowed me to stand on my luggage and jump around on it. That's how strong it is.

But yeah... as things fall into place the excitement builds. I still haven't configured my laptop, bought my stationery, webcam, applied for Skype, and started packing. But all in due time. All in due time. I have my study permit to collect, I have my accomodation, I have my courses (most of them). I don't have to panick anymore.

Anyway last night... was ok. Ok lah.

Met Ian for dinner at Baker's Inn (I refuse to call it by tt stupid new name). I always thought the food would be good. Okay lah, the food's not bad. But the serving sizes are for fucking rabbits. WTF. Fucking $12 for a plate of 'main course' and I'm STILL hungry. We ended up having a second dinner of mushroom swiss whoppers and onion rings at Burger King. Half the price, twice the quantity. NAH BEI.

I'm tired. I'm tired of trying to make it work. I'm tired of having to be the cheerful conversationalist, of trying to keep the flow, of trying to ask questions and sound interested. When all I get are deadpan uninterested monosyllabic answers, what do you expect me to do? What do you expect me to say? I don't have tt kind of patience or energy anymore. I'm sorry. There's guilt, there's obligation, but there's also a limit. And I think I've pretty much hit tt limit.

Wanyi called me around 9.30pm. She was at Zouk early!!! Wahaha. Left him to go find her at Grand Copthrone. HEH. We were lazing on the sofas waiting for Jane to join us... just bitching around (usual stuff). Was telling her about accents (I think it started off with Mark and Cambridge and how we were wondering if he would come back and try to talk like a Brit) and how some overseas Singaporeans kinda irritate me.

Haha... I can't believe tt there was actually this question tt was being asked: "What's your fave Hokkien word?"

That's just how kentang overseas Singaporeans can become.

For me, it's no point asking me tt kind of question. Coz the answer I'll be absolutely DYING to give (and Wanyi knows tt best) is 'kaninachaocheebye'. Just to see the reaction. Fucking politically-correct environments irritate the hell out of me.

Anyway to cut a long story short, THE MAMBO WHORES WERE REUNITED!!!

After a 3 month (or longer) hiatus, finally we numbered FOUR again! Samantha, Jane, Wanyi and me! And Phuture! It was our very last mambo before Wanyi leaves for Illinois for 6 months on August 15, and me for Vancouver for 1 year on August 25... No more full strength Mambo Whores for 1 whole year... man. That's going to be so unprecendented...

We didn't intend to drink, but in the end we got a little bit itchy. Jane wanted to order a Graveyard (since I strongly protest Long Island Tea), and William (Manthu's bf) told us tt this drink 'Hot and Sticky' tasted a lot better than Graveyard, but was equally potent... so we decided to try tt instead. Well. I think it will def taste better than Graveyard, but of course. It still tasted pretty bad. Like Long Island Tea, only less bad. And yuck. The tequila was damn strong. One thing about Zouk/Phuture: the drinks are potent.

A lot of monkeys were present at Phuture. A lot of bald NSmen too. Must have been the National Day 1-day leave thing. The crowd was ok actually; crowded but bearable (not as much pushing and shoving as when Phuture is REALLY packed)... Me and Jane were just dancing with each other... I actually messaged my boy later and told him I might be 20% lesbian coz I enjoy dancing with Jane (always have, always will. She's my fave dancing partner. Always has been. HEH.)... I think I was knida high. He panicked. I think he took me seriously. For some reason, he seems to have this fear tt some butch is going to steal me away from him.

We left Phuture really early though. By 1am, we were outside. Bored, yawning. I was sleepy. Think it was the effect of the alcohol. Sleeeeeeeepy, I was. So in the end, the 4 of us decided to go have supper at this zhi cha place in Havelock Road (pork ribs and Hokkien mee)... So much for clubbing. We all feel old. Or rather, the Mambo Whores are growing out of mambo.

Hmm.

I got home around 2.30am.

I've been telling people tt whenever I get really high or drunk, different things happen on different occasions. Sometimes I get so sleepy I fall asleep (on the dance floor), sometimes I become the IPM, sometimes I just end up babbling nonsense or even just laughing or crying uncontrollably...

Last night, I was moody. Extremely grouchy. My father had the misfortune of being awake when I was incredibly grouchy, so let's just say it wasn't a very pretty picture (yeah. I got a lecture about drinking and its effects this morning from him coz of last night. Fuck).

But in realisation, the effect tt alcohol has on me is in essence, it removes my inhibitions. My sense of control. I can control my thinking, my actions, and even my moods, normally. I know how to psycho myself to be cheerful or to be ok when I'm down or whatever, normally, because as long as I put my mind to it, anything is possible. But when I drink and I get high or more than tt, I can't be bothered anymore. It's not tt I can't, it's tt I really stop giving a flying fuck. So everything tt I want to do but don't normally coz of self-control, I just do it.

Oh well... I wonder if this means drinking is cathartic for me, or whether I should just avoid it more... HMM.

P.S. Eastside at UE Square is having a Lobsters offer on Mondays and Fridays. A whole 400g lobster on Aglio Olio pasta only costs $12.99 from 7 to 10pm... Anyone wants to go? There'll be beer too, btw.